Fed up

People should just leave me alone.

I am confused, scared and pissed off.

Don’t push me or i will bite

Wrong

Wrong person,

Wrong timing,

Same old story.

I give up.

Funny?

Almost one year since the day we parted,

After going around in circles, im still where i was at the begining.

You’re still what i really want.

Funny?

Done

I used to turn to alcohol every night

Alcoholism was my form of escape from this fucked up place

One Morning after a night of drunken madness

I woke up to see my room in a mess

Notes and books pushed over the desk

Work chair toppled lying on the floor

Everything on my shelves swept off scattered all over the floor

Body bruised and cut

Is this the real me lashing out all my anger on this world

A side of me which i kept in secret so well from everyone

I scared myself thinking of what could have possibly happened that night

It’s over, i’m done. Enough of all this self torture

At Dempsey Hill

At least in the darkness of this long tunnel, i can see someone holding up a torch at the end.

That’s Life

Work hard,

Play hard,

Party hard,

Fuck hard,

That is life.

With the first ever F1 night race in singapore over ( such an experience to be part of it ) and with the upcoming APPEC happening, work has been hectic. I spend so much time at work that it feels kind of weird not to be there on my off days seeing those angels faces and talking to my regular guests.

That is why i play hard when i can, i party real hard when i can, i get drunk when i can and fuck like you’re never ever gonna get a fuck again.

Ive been doing alot of thinking recently, i can be nice if you want me to be nice. I can be a jackass if you make me be a jackass. I know i broke hearts and i messed with quite alot of people’s hearts. That is just me, love me or hate me. My good friends know i am me and they love me for being me. I love myself 🙂

You think i don’t know you, think again.

Okay pictures,

Receptionist of the Year Finalist Cocktail Party at Orchard Park Hotel

s

This is my family .

Raffles Inc is my home away from home.

This is where i sell myself everyday.

Peace.

The Heart of The Matter

I got the call today, I didnt wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old, true friend of ours was talkin on the phone
She said youd found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And the struggles we went through
And how I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside loves open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?
Im learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, Im learning again
Ive been tryin to get down
To the heart of the matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think its about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you dont love me anymore
These times are so uncertain
Theres a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age?
The trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
Theyre the very things – we kill I guess
Pride and competition
Cannot fill these empty arms
And the work I put between us
You know it doesnt keep me warm
Im learning to live without you now
But I miss you, baby
And the more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought Id figured out
I have to learn again
Ive been trying to get down
To the heart of the matter
But everything changes
And my friends seem to scatter
But I think its about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you dont love me anymore
There are people in your life whove come and gone
They let you down you know they hurt your pride
You better put it all behind you baby; life goes on
You keep carryin that anger; itll eat you up inside, baby
Ive been trying to get down
To the heart of the matter
But my will gets weak
And my thought seem to scatter
But I think its about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you dont love me
Ive been tryin to get down
To the heart of the matter
Because the flesh will get weak
And the ashes will scatter
So Im thinkin about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you dont love me
Forgiveness
Forgiveness – baby
Forgiveness
Forgiveness
Forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, you dont love me anymore

PHUCKet

Sawadeekup!

Just got back from phuket and it was fantastic!

Thai food, sun, sand sea, snorkling, visiting the many beautiful islands, bangla street and not forgetting the lady boys :p

First night was so sinful, bangla street ( don’t bring your gf there or you will lose your head ), so full of booze and sex followed by a good thai full body massage 🙂

Second day was spent relaxing by the pool gettin a good tan ( roasted in this case ) and walkin the beach.

Last day was the best.. a one day trip to phi phi island, krabi and other amazing islands and beaches. 

Great food, great fun, great company.

Will upload pictures soon, pictures still going through the board of censors! lol

 

 

 

Phuket we will be back to terrorize soon!

Drowning

I am totally absorbed into my work.

Datelines to meet, 4 hours of sleep a day.

Developing an alcohol addiction, i bought a bottle of bombay sapphire to subdue my addiction every night.

F**king family issues.

I can feel myself slowly draining and collapsing soon.

Only thing that is saving me right now is those very few people that really care unlike some that just drop everything and leave everything behind.

Rena and Jacq thank you for putting up with my nonsense, thank you for buying me food when you know i can’t afford to take a break to have my meals.

Jacq thanks for getting so mad at me when i kept putting off going for my break to eat. That’s the first time i ever saw you so angry what the hell :p

I ran away from home for 3 nights, the sight of you is just so disgusting, gawd i can’t even bare to look at you anymore.

Much needed break coming up on friday when i leave this country.

Hopefully i regain some of my sanity back by then.

Ok just some pictures.

People that make it happen

This is family

Jacq, she ROBBED me 😉

The end is the beginning is the end.

Predator and Prey

Im back in the hunt and i want to PLAY!

Zouk

Fumito, Ryan, Iman and I

What a blast.

Never had such fun in ages.

Special shout out to Jacq, long time no see, it was fun!

Val aka Aftiel, sorry i rejected your advances, next time ok? LOL

Round two coming very soon!

/dance